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Thursday, November 25, 2010

Thanksgiving Double Rainbow

Boring topic, huh? Sorry. It's been over a month since I last wrote, which I can hardly believe. They, They Who Know, say bloggers should post regularly, no less than once a week. I've fallen down on the job, apparently, so I might as well take advantage of the built-in theme offered by Thanksgiving and say a few words about what I am grateful for.

Aside from the dog keeping to himself whatever nastiness he ate on his afternoon walk and allowing us to sleep through the night, first and most, I am grateful for my improved state of mind, which has a ripple effect on my family. Now my children are no longer studying my face's every change of expression. While I have a newfound awareness of how acute my 3rd grader's observation of my moods is ("Mommy, why did you make that sound with your breath?"), I'm relieved I can offer her information on a broader spectrum of the emotional rainbow than I was accessing for a while. The change has been gradual, and I observed things must be lightening up when my kids started commenting on how stressed out Mommy was. If they felt safe enough to speak up, then things were improving.

There's a certain amount of grin-and-bear-it to adult life that I've lately come to appreciate. I can't really attribute the improvement in my mood to anything other than just enduring the rough transition from city to suburbs. My father-in-law, whom I am remembering today, used to say with a laugh, This too shall pass. Relative to the phases of my elder daughter's infancy I was dealing with at the time, I found the phrase extremely comforting. I am grateful to him for that, and I'm missing him now, on the ninth anniversary season of his death.

The other day, my 3rd grader and I saw a double rainbow. I've now seen a real rainbow twice in my life, and both times have been in my new hometown. However much I've begrudged my existence here, I recognize that where I am has a good view of sky. I am grateful for that.